It’s that time of year again. Have you been naughty or nice? Maybe a little of both? At this time I choose to share my twist on a very old classic. Enjoy. 🙂
“‘Twas the Naughty Night Before Christmas”
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro’ the house,
Not a shifter was stirring, not even a mouse;
The Condoms were stored by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Devon McCormack soon would be there;
Some writers were nestled, some hogging the beds
While visions of naked men danced through their heads
And Leela in leather, with Jase and his nightcap
Were attempting to recoup from a bar fight mishap
When out on the lawn Daisy made such a clatter,
Jase leapt from the floor to see what was the matter
Away to the window Jase flew like a flash,
Tripping over Mary Wallace in his mad dash
The shimmer of glow sticks on the new fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to the people below
When, what to his sleep deprived eyes should appear
But a gaggle of authors, the best of the year
With a wicked hot leader, so vibrant and quick
Jase knew right away it was Becky Condit
With starbucks, swag to free Wifi they came
And Becky whistled, and shouted, and call’d them by name
Hey Posy, Riley,Tara, and Glenn
Yo! Skinner, Valentine, Parkinson, and Lynne.
To the top of the porch! The key hangs on the wall!
Then dash up the stairs don’t forget the gag ball.
As wicked words whispered ripe to unfold
Meet with idle authors, troubles soon to be told
So up to the house they strode two by two
Both naughty and nice, both lacking virtue.
All joyful and merry far from aloof
Some powered by alcohol, one-hundred proof
They opened the door ready for another round
When down the chimney a stripper came with a bound:
He was dress’d all in leather, from his head to his foot
With his bronze skin layered in glitter and soot
Sex toys galore could be seen in his sack
And a radio within played, baby got back
His hips how they swiveled to music so merry
His cheeks were rock hard, g-string red as a cherry
Devon finally arrived with Karrie Jax in tow
Tens, twenties and fives stuffed way down below,
Piper Kay peeked into his bag of goodies and sweets
Sharing only with Cardeno, her pilfered treats
The dancer made the rounds with much Joy and glee
And boy was he packing from what Jase could see.
The music grew louder, books shook on the shelf
Laughter and leering at the leather bound elf.
The man gave a wink when his g-string he shed
Suddenly lights through the window flashed blue and red
A siren blared and all those present gave a jerk.
The man dived for his clothes finished with his work
And with a tuck and a zip, package enclosed
With one last shimmy, up the chimney he rose
With the cops at the door the authors did hide
Leaving Draven, who was fit to be tied
But Jase heard Draven exclaim, as the squad car took flight-
Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
This holiday season I’ll be releasing a new book, with my good friend LL Dahlin just after the new year. So I guess that makes me a little nice. 🙂 Below is an excerpt for you to enjoy. After which, leave a comment about your favorite romantic pairing, to be entered to win a ten dollar Amazon gift card.
Brayden rubbed his face against Croix, loving the slight abrasion from the five-o’clock shadow. “Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to be with a man? To be with me?”
Croix jerked back, his eyes wide with shock, but what surprised Brayden was the desire in their depths. “I’m not having this conversation with you right now.” Croix opened the door.
“Why not?” Brayden’s alcohol induced haze pushed him to the brink of bravery and right into the well of insanity. The questions and cravings he’d had for his friend for so long rose to the surface.
“You’re drunk,” Croix muttered, shoving him into the car.
“Not so drunk I don’t know what I want,” Brayden admitted for the first time out loud. Later he could blame the alcohol, but right now, in this moment, it was surreal. Croix actually looked at him with fire in his eyes; there was lust there, or Brayden was delusional. He closed his eye, murmuring, “Not that it will ever happen.”
The door slammed, and the other opened, followed by another loud bang. He could swear he could feel Croix’s warmth across the console seeping into his skin. The scent of leather and Croix’s spicy, musky cologne filled the small space.